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This practice of living together seems like a good way to achieve some of the benefits of marriage and avoid the risk of divorce, meaning couples(rather lovers) can find out if their partner has what it takes to be married.Other reason could be they do not have to seek legal permission to dissolve their union. But the fact is, even if they want, the lack of legal documents deprives them of their rights and benefits.
This has generated concerns for the parents. But the irony is, such practice is also accredited to the lack of love and care from their(cohabitants') parents-it may be true, it may not be true. What ever it may be, majority of our society still considers that living together before marriage is morally wrong and unwise preparation for married life-but i am neutral.
I feel this is commonly practiced by college students studying abroad (may be even the students within) and many young men and women who are into jobs(working); it has become more of fashion today and is felt a matter of proud amongst the friends. There is no hard feeling involved here-Just my thought though.
Believe it or not, recent studies have shown that:
1.Those who cohabit before marriage are the least likely to marry each other
2.Those who live together before marriage have higher separation and divorce rates
3.Those who are sexually active before marriage are much more likely to have extramarital affairs and finally divorce
4.Those who live together have no lasting commitments or responsibilities
5.Those who live together before marriage often lay a foundation of distrust and lack of respect
Referred from: (http://ezinearticles.com/?Cohabitation-Before-Marriage---Good-or-Bad-Consequences?&id=736344 ) note: I don't conclude that "cohabitation" is bad, morally wrong and unwise; i believe everyone has the right and freedom to choose. It all depends on individual's thought and decision. Unless one is comfortable with this, i personally don't see any wrong involved in it (views differ though).
Wow, I thought too that living together before marriage could, like you said, develope a deeper bond, and last longer. Its a news to me that the research shows otherwise. But like it or not, irrespective of what studies show, I think the trend is here to stay.
ReplyDeleteHere in the western, such practices are very much common. In fact, they say that once they turn 18, their parents kind of disown them, and they will have to figure out how to make a living or go to the college. So they decide to leave together as a couple, and work towards a common goal. Quite a win-win suitation, but sometimes such practices lead to a problematic life.
Pema, even i felt same.I heard the word "living together" for the first time when i was in the college.I felt the practice was rather "fashionable" especially for the collegians but after my second thought i felt that our society is still not ready to agree on it. But i am neutral-i believe it all depends on individuals-their "take" on this.
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised to read your findings about higher divorce, higher instances of infidelity etc. among adults who co-habitate before marriage! Everything else I've ever read on the topic indicates the opposite, showing that 'trial marriages' are the best way to establish a stable marriage and to avoid a bad match-up. Your linked source doesn't give his sources so I'm curious what culture he is reporting from.
ReplyDeleteHi Andrea,thanks for visiting my blog.
ReplyDeleteEven i thought "cohabitation" would actually avoid "bad match-up" but some sources show otherwise; you may follow the given link and read the article: Cohabitation Before Marriage - Good or Bad Consequences? this is one of the articles given in the link page. best of luck!!!